Do you ever feel stuck in your ways? Whether it's nutrition, health or just bad habits, we sometimes have the tendency to think that changing is too overwhelming. And how it's been is just how it's always going to be. Well today, the guys want to dispel this myth with one simple phrase.
Change seems hard, but historically change was the only constant.
The power of self-talk.
Understanding that language shapes our individual world.
How reconditioning the brain takes time.
Our relationship to the change in others.
More homework! Chad has a simple assignment for listeners.
What does "running the old records" mean?
And how shame is the fuel of the old stories.
If you're looking to change the health of your body and mind, Eric has something that can help! It's called bioStak, and with 2 capsules a day you get the 5 essential micronutrients to completely activate your Nrf2. Check it out at bioStak.com.
Want some cool gifts? Eric and Chad spend a lot of time on this podcast trying to provide valuable content to listeners like you. If you have found value in the podcast, would you consider becoming a patron?
Check out our link at www.patreon.com/lifeinketosis.
We also have some really awesome exclusive gifts there for listeners that pledge!
And if you’re interested in starting your own journey, you can find out more information at biofitcoaching.com or on Instagram @biofit_coaching
Chad: 00:00 Whatever your experiences were in the past, so maybe you've tried to change your eating habits in the past and it didn't go successfully, right? You didn't, for whatever reason at that moment in time you didn't have the willpower or you didn't have the resources or you didn't feel good or whatever that reason is that it didn't work for you. That now becomes a record that you play, right? So now anytime you think about a diet, what do you compare it to or a or a change in eating you, you compare it or you put it in the framework of that story.
Chad: 00:37 They say a journey begins in a single step or in my case, one less piece of bread. My name is Chad and I'm a seeker. I have sought out an expert in the field of nutrition and fitness. Who I hoped would help me feel well better. They call them the biohacker, but I call him Eric. I hope you'll join me in a path that leads you and I to optimal fitness, the body and the mind as we live our life in ketosis. This is the life and Ketosis podcast. A biohackers guide to optimal body performance.
Chad: 01:21 Hello everyone. My name is Chad and this is my quest to achieving the healthy state of being with the man that can give me there my mentor and cohost. He is the science to my regular guy, the extreme testing to my. I'll take your word for it. The biohacker himself. Mr Eric Bischof. Somewhere along this journey of ours, I realized somewhere along this journey of ours I realized that feeling better is really one part physical and mental and both are needed to achieve the optimal state of being what I call keto, happiness or ketosis. And today we're talking about Eric, a little phrase I like to call up until now. Well, I don't like to call that. That's the actual phrase up until now. So let me give you a little background on this just really quick, but before I do that, how are you doing today?
Eric: 02:07 I'm doing good. How about you? Good. Very, very good. I'm kind of excited about this topic.
Chad: 02:12 Yeah, it's going to be fun. We'll play with it a little bit. So as, as you know, being a coach change is one of the hardest things that we faced as, as humans for some reason. I mean we are ancestrally were bred to change. That's, that's all our ancestors knew was changed, right? Seasons were constantly changing. So you had to change where you were living. The herds were constantly moving, so you had to change the way you hunted all, I mean everything was, was about change and then we became very, very comfortable and change became this thing that we started to resist. So now when in our comfy state of being in 2018, almost 2000, whenever we want to change something specifically about ourselves or, or in the world or whatever it, it seems very difficult. And I think, I mean you can speak to this as a coach, but as you coach people who are going through, I mean immense amounts of change, how, how much do they resist that?
Eric: 03:21 It's, it's basically a lifestyle change. Yeah. And that's all encompassing almost. Especially whether you get to nutrition. Okay. And obviously, you know, a physical being, you know, through exercise, through movement, etc. And so it really initiating a complete changeover and some people I have to say are changing back. OkAy. So they were in the past. Okay. And you know, very into nutrition, good living, clean living movement, you know, they felt great. so they experienced coming back to that feeling okay. And some people have never been there, so it's not a change back. It's a new complete change lifestyle change. And so I've always had that when I look at their history because I asked all these questions and it says, you know, during college I was this, this and this. I, I, I weighed this, I felt great. I ran all the time. I was social, my foods were great. I tried, you know, paleo or vegan or vegetarian. I was constantly thinking about my nutrition and now they let it all go. I mean they're obese, they have diabetes and I'm like, oh great. And they've experienced what it was like before. And it makes the challenge a little easier as a coach because I can draw back on those means or whatever you want to call it, those feelings of the past, which we don't want to dwell on those paths because it can make them very unhappy. Right. You and I mean, you know, you got to stay in the present. All right. Yeah.
Chad: 04:53 So yeah, so we're gonna we're gonna actually. Talk about that. We're going to talk about the relationship of past to change. So I'm just to bring people up to speed. We're goIng to talk. This episode is all going to be about the psychology of change and the formula that I use to help people change in a somewhat of an effortless way. I mean, it still takes effort. It still takes sticktuitiveness, but at least this is a secret that gets you there, right? so if you think about it in, in your coaching, and when I do mindset coaching, we're literally in the business of change. Yep. That's what we're doing, right? We're in the business of change. We're in the business of improvement, but we're doing it with human beings who are complex and who have backstories and who have history and pasts and self talk and you know, they're so in their heads. I mean, I'm not telling you anything you don't know.
Eric: 05:51 You know, it's interesting you bring that up because you, you have the same issues. Well, I do. I'm not, I don't know your iSsues, you know, some of my. But I, I struggle with the same stuff, you know, and so a lot of times when I'm coaching I'm actually coaching myself because I'm like, all right, I'm a big. Are you practicing what you're preaching basically, you know, and I'm always about real intent, you know? And that's probably been a kind of a. something's really slowed me down because I always want to have real intent of purpose of why I think so. It's a struggle. It really is. SO this podcast is going to be really good for me. I think I may just to learn from you.
Chad: 06:33 I want to start out in a place where I think it's common ground for everybody before we kind of get into the new stuff and the and the, the tools that I want to share that will probably be new to a lot of people. I want to start with some common ground, so the common ground that I want to talk about and and once again this isn't going to be anything new to most of our listeners and definitely not to you, is the power of self talk. How incredibly powerful our self talk is, right? When we're inside of our heads and we're talking to ourselves, what are the things that we say the most, right? What are those things? You and I, you were just sharing a story with me before we hit record about when you were a kid and the recording that you had going in your head was sticks and stones may break my bones, but words will never hurt me because you were this small kid. That was when
Eric: 07:24 I was four foot 10 and a half or 11 inches when I started high school and I weighed under 70 pounds. You were the easy target. I went to 11 different schools right up as we talk about change change every year. That's rightl. I, yeah, you're right. And that was an a meme. I call it me, my mother instilled and mainly because I would come home and say, mom, they picked me last again. They don't, you know, I'm always pick the last. I'm always, you know, the midget was the term I was constantly called the midget aaa. I always asked me if I was a midget. I was very short and the sad things. I had a twin sister, which was great because I got to go through change with her, so I can't say I faced all the changes by myself. She was a head taller than me, so like 16th birthday. So I just felt like it was like I was definitely small.
Chad: 08:16 So when we, we play these records in our head and they just go on a loop, they're just over and over and over and over again, the needle resets and we play these, these phrases, and oftentimes they're phrases that we picked up unintentionally. Yeah. And the hold us in the place that we currently are, right? The. So as a man thinketh, so is he right? We know that term. And that is these, these records, are these fraser's is this self talk that goes on in our head all of the time. And so my point in this podcast, my principal in this, in helping others change is we're actually going to change that record who if we change that phrase and we adopt it and we play it enough in our heads. Then we change, right? And so a lot of times, especially with dieting or exercise, we go after the symptom of the record, but we never change the record never changed. We never just take that, you know, that record off the player and pick a new one.
Eric: 09:21 And I, I love this, this idea, because this conversation that you have in your head, I call it my conversation with self talk, whatever is where, where did the conversation begin? Where did these thoughts begin? And a lot if we have negative ones, a lot of times, I hate to say it comes from parents, your siblings, your relatives, your teachers were, you're no good. You'll never amount to thiS area. If you're constantly lazy, you just don't do it. I mean, what were, I mean it begins somewhere obviously, and you are going to talk about this. Well, you know where it begins and where it goes, obviously that's what we're working on.
Chad: 09:57 Well look, the world is a tough place. There's no if, ands, or buts about it, that the world is a tough place and it will eat you up and chew. It will chew you up and spit you out if you let it. But we have to. When we learned tools and we learned principles that allow us to get ourselves to a place that we want to be mentally, physically, all of that kind of stuff than we are in choice, right? We're in the driver's seat rather than saying being a victim of the world saying, well, but the world is so hard. It's so tough. And now I just adopted all this self talk because it's a tough world out there and, and it made me feel like I was nothing or you know, or you know, all of these whatever thing. So the other part of this foundation that I want to lay is, um, well first, before we go there, I want to, I want to hear some of your observations on self-talk with some of your clients. I mean, you've been coaching people for years and years. Um, and I love it. I love athletic Psychology. I think it's fascinating. Um, and I would just love to see some are here, maybe just a brief observation from you as far as self talk and how it affects the success of your clients.
Eric: 11:13 I, I think it's um, and I, and I try, I go into some of it with some of my clients, I get into the emotional part and it just comes into it because I'm a coach and I'm, I, I'm better off with nutrition, I'm better off with the science of how the body works and everything in the brain is a big attraction. To me. Depression is becoming a real attraction to maybe cause inflammation and you know, what's behind it, but getting into the actual, you know, I do chat with them about getting rid of these negative self talk that they actually were coming from the past with. Some suffer from an ex husbands that were just brutal on them physically. I mean not physically touching it. I'm just saying, you know, about their body type, why aren't you this? Why aren't you that they, that they desire this, their parents on top, you're going to be one of these fat kids, you're going to be, you got to stop eating. And, and a lot of those that I'm dealing with are, you know, in the obese situation, their body composition and it does come from the medic messaging from the past. A lot of it is emotional eating and that's what I'm working with a lot of people that dopamine reward because it's real, it is real. And, and, and I, and I, I struggled with a lot of my clients, like we've got, you know, I always call it the dopamine hit even I, I have that issue still that dopamine hit and I've been keto over three years and I'm very dedicated and very strong. So it's always that chatter, self talk, I call it chatter that you're dealing with your brain every day in. So you either have to choose to, you know, we all kind of live in the past. Okay. Or we Are living dreaming of the future but jumping out of the present. So my question is like, with you, I, I'm trying to, how do you coach and teach people and yourself to stay in the present? Because we all like to hang on to it. We do hang onto the past, either good or bad, you might have lots of glory and accolades. It was I was this and this and high school and in my college days and you hang onto that and don't create new. I'm always thinking about creating new memories for yourself in the present. So it coaching, it's big. It's just trying to work with each one individually. You know, the athletes that, the elites, those, they're driven so driven. I, you know, there's an ego driving them, you know, type a personality you might say, so they don't have time so they're going in the future, but a lot of times they ignore and it catches up with them sooner or later because they always have this drive for something and then when you achieve it, you know, now you got to start over and you've got to start over on sooner or later you the real you has to come out. The trophies, the podiums, they all, they just fade away. I really do.
Chad: 14:12 And you know, the majority of, of humans are driven by two, two different things. It's either a regret of the past or a fear and anxiety of the future. Yes, those are largely are two motivators to do anything in life and I love that you brought up bringing you brought up, bringing it into the present living for now and why are you doing it now? And that's where I'm going to take this. So that second piece of this foundation is understanding that language shapes our world, right? So a lot of people, as I go through this, as we, as you and I go through this conversation, a lot of people are going to be thinking in their head, oh my gosh, it's just like he's just changing words around, right? He's just playing with words. And my reaction is exactly. Because we see our world through language. It's the only way we know how to interpret it. ThInk about. And it's true. If you saw something, you don't have a word for it, how are you going to describe it to me? You're going to describe it to me with words that you do know that closely relate to whatever you can figure out. Right? And so we do the exact same thing. So the, the, the best tool we have to change these, this self talk in our head is language. So think about that though. The words that we use are so impactful. And so I'm gonna I'm going to give you some words to use in place of all of these past stories. That's what I call them as these past stories that we replay over and over again.
Eric: 15:41 I have a question before you get into it. Yeah. My wife wants to know, you know the self talk. Maybe I shouldn't share this, but it's actually. I do a lot of self talk, but it actually gets verbalized out loud now and she'll say, who are you talking to? Who you're talking to? And I'm like, oh, what's that talk it. I don't even know. I mean I'm just working. I'm talking. And she goes, why do you call yourself like in the third person, you say, Eric, you should be doing this. Eric. I'm cAlling myself by my name. Eric keeps data. I shouldn't be doIng this. You should be doing. It's eric and maybe have. Maybe that's part of the language, the word I don't know, but maybe you're channeling your inner mother or something. I dunno. Maybe I'm treating my. Maybe there's an advantage of treating yourself as a third person. Like you're, you're teaching somebody, you're talking to somebody. Maybe that's it because I swear you say Eric. I'm like, yeah, maybe I do self talk
Chad: 16:42 and I don't think the framework matters as much as what the conversation is. Right. How you have that conversation. Doesn't matter as much as what the conversation is.
Eric: 16:51 I pay more attention when I use the word Eric instead of I. Yeah. It's like I'm coaching Eric, but I'm actually coaching myself, so yeah, that's kinda weird, but I don't know. Yeah, that's really interesting. You got to get. help me get an answer from your life.
Chad: 17:06 Well, I don't have the answer, but we can. We can look it up. They get a psychotherapist and it may be out there. You can help me. Help me. I'll go ahead. Yeah, yeah, exactly. We probably have some listeners that are therapists or psychologists. Eric, get back to listening to chad. Okay, here we go. So when it's, when we, it's when we decide that we're no longer going to let our past stories run us and be commItted to something new. Now what I want, what most of you are hearing me say is I'm good being committed to something better and I want to be really careful. I want to point out that I said being committed to something not better because if you say, I'm committed to something better, I'm committed to being better, I want to do that better. It's all still based off of your past story, right? So whatever those, whatever your experiences were in the past. So maybe you've tried to change your eating habits in the past and it didn't go successfully, right? You didn't, for whatever reason at that moment in time you didn't have the willpower or you didn't have the resources or you didn't feel good or whatever that reason is that it didn't work for you. That now becomes a record that you play, right? So now anytime you think about a diet, what do you compare it to? Or a or a change in eating you, you compare it or you put it in the framework of that story and then what we do is that record plays while we're trying to do it again and we have the same results that we had before because we're literally playing that story out. I always do this. I, every time I tried to change how I eat, I always, I never had the willpower. I always get sick. I always do this, I always do that. And it's all based on that past story. So the challenges is to become less committed to what your story was in the past and more committed to what is possible or what's new, right and new is in the moment because it's now it's new, it's, it's, it's this moment. And that thing will then become not new once you're past that present moment. Does that make sense? But it can be your new, new way of operating, right?
Eric: 19:31 Um, so you're keeping it from going into the future, which we all want to procrastinate to the future. When this gets better or this changes or my job changes and everything is not yet, you know what I mean? Not yet. Usually means what never. Right. Basically. So it's staying like you're saying, get that story right now. Create a new, a new story. Yeah. Basically.
Chad: 19:55 Yeah. So the, how this looks for me is um, like with working out, I have, I, I like to make sure I work out at least four times a week. Doesn't always happen, but it three always happens. Um, and so for me it's always, it's a conversation of where do I stand right now? Right? So if, if it's wednesday and I haven't worked out yet that week, which is rare, but it definitely happens is I have to not have to. I put my, I, I worked, I practiced to put myself in a position where I say, where am I at right now? What do I need right now? I need, I've got this many days left in the week and I want to do this many workouts throughout the week and I know where I stand. So I need, I want to work out right now. That's where I'm at, right? Instead of saying, oh my gosh, it's wednesday, only have four more days. What have I been doing all these days? I'm so lazy. I'm so stupid. I always do this. I always put it off. That added that all of those stories that could allow those stories to run me because I could find evidence that they're true. Right? Um, but, uh, but it really helps to put myself in this place of right now. Right? So here's the phrase that I, and I introduced it really quickly in the beginning of the podcast and the phrases up until now, right? So you have all of these stories from the past. You can't just make them disappear. Our brains don't work that way. When we condition our brains, it's over time. and when we condition our brain into something over time, it takes time to recondition it. We can't just turn that off like a switch. Right? I think most people would agree with that is that once you've created a habit, as humans, it's very, very difficult to turn it off like an off switch. So the way that we now relate to those stories is using the phrase up until now, I don't know. Yeah. Yeah. So it's super powerful. Any my clients and and some of my coaching clients, my mindset coaching clients have started listening to the podcast because they now know that I'm bringing some of this content into the conversation, which is awesome. So they're going to relate to this. I called them on it every single time we're in conversation. So whenever they go into, we're talking about some change they want to make, right? some goal, they want to go after some thing they want to do or achieve or whatever. And they tell me, you know, but I always sabotage these conversations every single time I say up until now and never fails to switch in their mind. And It's like, oh yeah, up untIl now, up untIl now, the way that I've asked, the way that I have behaved in this scenario, in the past has nothing to do with the way that I can behave in it right now. And it's the present. Do you see the power of this shift? Right? So we, we tweak our language just just a lIttle bit
Eric: 23:01 because the past in I have clients just beat themselves up, you know, for the past. I'm not talking about past from childhood on path like past last few days yesterday and no, I failed, I failed and I'm constantly, hey, new day, new day, one day at a time, let's just do maybe one meal at a time. Let's just go for that. And it's those little steps that sooner or later, you know, and you know, it, it, it takes over one little success, another success. He just gets to a bIgger success. Yeah. Yeah. I like that. Up until now, I never thought of it that way. I, I, I liked the words
Chad: 23:39 and you think about, I mean, as you think about the psychology behind it, for some reason we, um, as a, as a human culture, I think this is pretty universal around the world. I'll just say american culture at least for now and then. And then people can help us understand If this is something that's, that's all over the place. But we, it became honorable at some point to be static, never changing a rock, anchor an island and some, you know, somewhere along the way that became um, honorable. Yes. But really as we, as we started this conversation out, we, human beings are very dynamic. We change all the time. The only constant is change, right? And so to pretend like I'm, the way we operated yesterday is the exact same way we have to operate today because I'm a person of honor, right? I, that's who I am, that's my personnel. We have so much language around it. That's who I am. That's my personality. I, you know, I can't change whatever steady, steady. Yeah. Oh, I'm solid. And, and obviously we want to have morals and we want to keep those morals and you know, all of that kind of stuff. But it's very, very, um, important for us to realize that we are dynamic. Not only that we're dynamic, other people are dynamic as well because we don't give other people the room to change. Right? Correct. What, what In your experience, Eric, somebody who has been obese or overweight or sedentary for a long time, what happens when they decide they're going to make a change in their life? What happens with their community around them and the people who are closest to them?
Eric: 25:32 It's. It's sad because there's, you know, you always want their suPport. Okay. You want that community to be your friends, to be behind you. Okay, but who are you still? You're doing the same habits with the friends that you had and you know, bad habits. You'd call them bad it just on an unhelpful hills and all of a sudden you're, you're back in that the community that your support and they're not doing what you're doing. And sometimes there's, there's envy, there's jealousy like, oh, you think you're better than me? Look at you. You're all keto and you're doing this and sooner or later, you know you lost that support group and that hurts. And a lot of people say, hey, I was out. I get this all the time. I was out with my friends. I, I've failed. I succumb to the temptation and I had this you know and it's really hard. They talk about socially, it is really hard to be that person on the outside and that's why if you got kid, I hate to say it, those that share the same interests as you in especially in lifestyle, it just makes it easier. Know you guys go to the gym together, you hang together, you eat together and thIngs that just. It's back to that community support.
Chad: 26:45 Yeah, so what I've noticed and and I think you're basically saying the same thing, is that obviously a lot of my clients and people who I know who are close in my circles who are wanting to make big changes in their life, they do have a few people that are very supportive. I'm there for the most part. What I've seen is that those who are around them are scared for them to change for this very reason, that they see people, that that people should be static and people should stay the same because change is scary. Change is hard. What if they become more social than me? What if they become, you know, all of these, their friend anymore and they let these past records of how they have interacted in the past and how their relationship has been. They let those records run them right, and so it's contagious and it's this cycle and it's vicious. If they were in this scenario, if those support, if those friends and family members understood this principle, they could say, well, up in the up until now, this has been my relationship with you as this type of person, or you know, with these types of habits, but what's new? What can we commit to me knew how could read we reinvent this relationship? How can we reinvent the way that we interact with each other? Yes. We used to go to the bar and get bar food and beers together. what if we became workout buddies? What if we be, you know, I, you know, so there's, it's, it's, you can see that this permeates into every aspect of change both in yourself when you're the one changing and in those around you. And so it helps to understand that that people around you might be going through that. It's nothing personal, it's that they're allowing these past records to run them just as much as you are,
Eric: 28:37 even it, even with your own spouse, if one takes a different lifestyle change and the other it wants to stay in the lifestyle that they've been in. Say they shared the same lifestyle, nutrition or physical exercise, whatever hobbies, etc. It, it creates, it creates an issue. So at times, and it's, it's really, it's really tough to manage for the person that's making that lifestyle change and so on. And so I still eat and donuts and popcorn and whatever. Just loving it. And you're really trying to get on that change. It makes it really good.
Chad: 29:11 I don't know. I don't know about you. I don't know where it lies statistically. I bet there are some statistics around thIs and I'd be really interested to see them. But in my own social circle, my, my friends and family who have gotten divorces, um, a good majority of them was because one partner change for the better or maybe not for the better but, but a change happened like a drastic change and they couldn't figure out a way of being in that relationship. And sometimes I'm not going to glorify that they should, right? Maybe it's not but, but it's just interesting that it's really hard for us to deal with people in our lives that are changing and
Eric: 29:53 I'm working and coaching people to change their script. Everybody comes together And they've got to join their two scripts together to make one script to be happy basically. And now when you're coaching somebody that's changing their script a little bit and now all of a sudden the script changes and, and so far a lot of the spouses either or been so supportive. I mean really because it's, you know, when you're talking health, your diabetes, you got obesity, metabolic syndrome, et cetera. It's, it's, it's very beneficial. And everybody, most couples see it. Okay. But if one starting to just go completely a different direction, then you see there's some script issues going to be careful as it goes. It's really hard sometimes.
Chad: 30:42 Yeah. Hey Eric, let's pause really quick. Our conversation and just talk about bioStak. BioStak's been incredibly. It's been so incredibly fun to watch people take on bioStak and just see the benefits. I wanted to just take a quick minute. There's so many benefits, but I wanted, I, I want to put you on the spot here really quick and just, I want you to highlight just one benefit from bioStak that people are talking about that you've experienced, um, and, and just kind of give our listeners a little bit of a little one.
Eric: 31:16 I can't just do one, you know, terrible, terrible at this. I won a. I feel many of them anyway. I will get the one function that has to come into play is everything basically mitochondrial function, right to the root of it. You are going to really increase the function of your mitochondria. Remember, everything comes from mitochondria from diseases and illnesses and free radicals and oxidative stress, dying, longevity. Everything comes from the mitochondria, so if we can have any true benefit, it's going to the source and making your mitochondria more efficient. Your electric transport, change your website. Okay, I won't.
Chad: 32:01 So I'm just going to jump in here. You cheated. What do. Well, because your answer, I mean if the mitochondria function is good, that that results into like 100,000 different benefits. And for those of you, for those of you that are running, uh, as we're talking about running old stories in our minds, those of you that are running the old story, well, I'm just not a supplement person. I've never been a supplement person. I'm not a supplement person up until now, right? So in, in my conversations with clients, when they give me this, you know, this, this answer of well I've always done it this way or I've and I say, well, up until now, up and down, right? And I help them adopt that language and it's been really, really helpful. So that's helpful to put those old records and those old scripts and you know, whatever we're calling them, noise, whatever. It's helpful to put it in its proper place, but then what? Right what, where do we go from there? and for me, it's what is my new way of operating? I love that phrase. What's my new way of operating? So up until now, I've operated this way, now what am I committed? How am I committed to operating now, right now? What's, what's, what's possible for me right now? and that takes it from the past to the present, right now, what am I committed to? Right? And once people can put those records in their proper place, they'll still play, but then they can say, well, up until now, that's how I've done it. Now I'm committed to yada, yada, yada. This my new mode of operation, or basically, yeah, absolutely. It's very, very powerful. It's an incredibly powerful conversation to have to change that language for people. Um, and um, and I'm, I'm just, I, I wanna, I want to help others understand that not only are these, these thIngs running in their own minds, but the same things are running in, in your social circle as well. So don't be discouraged as you see people not do well with your change or you know, your new way of operating or whatever. Just give them the grace and know that they don't have the tools yet to put those old records in their proper place.
Eric: 34:22 Yeah, I like that because I've always been always one to say, hey, create your own memories. So let's create your own story. So the same word can. That's how I grew up in his lap times. We, we end up spending all our time in other people's memories are stories and I and I always reflect on how I used to live to my children's stories, so to speak. They're memories that they're creating for themselves became my memories for some reason because I wanted to live through their accolades and be a part of them. And sooner or later they're creating their own stories. But you're creating a story for yourself out of them. And I finally started saying, yeah, Eric is Eric. Here comes Eric again, Eric, create your memories, your own story. And sometimes we get lazy and we start to live through other people's stories. You know, and their memories and we don't create our own memories in our own stories, new stories of the president you're talking about and that's why it took me a lot of years to overcome, you know, I had to get out of my kids stories and it took counseling from, for me to do that actually because, you know, parents get caught up in their kids and stuff and you and you get taken out of your own stuff until even to this day, I tell my kids, dads creating his own memories right now. I got to go do this today.
Chad: 35:44 Yeah, absolutely. And, and it's generational, right? You talked about it in one generation, but just think about it. How far do those stories go back? Oh, I mean, if you are really wanting to dig into this topic, I can nerd out. I can really nerd out on this when we'd start talking about ancestrally and some of the stories and records that we pass on through generations. There's really quick. I'll tell you a fun. There's an anecdotal, uh, some people may have heard it. I think it's pretty, it's pretty well known, but basically there's this family, right? They're preparing is very timely thanksgiving time and uh, their apparent preparing the thanksgiving dinner and they're getting ready to put the, uh, the, the Turkey into the oven and the mom cuts off both ends of the Turkey before she puts it in the pan to put it in the oven. And her daughter, a young daughter, says, mom, why? Why do you cut the ends off the Turkey? And the mom says, I don't know, that's the way I was taught. We just always did it. It's the way you cook a Turkey, right? That's, I mean, that's the real answer. It's the way you cook a Turkey. And uh, and then she got curious and went and asked her mom, mom, why do we cut the ends off the Turkey before we, before we cook it? And she says, oh, well great. Grandma betty had too small of an oven for the Turkey. That grandpa always bought her. so she'd cut the ends off the Turkey to fit it into the oven. Right. And so it's this, it's this cool illustrations show like we, we continued these stories and these records for generations and generations, not even knowing why we're running them, but it's just what you do and until we're willing to question those and say, okay, up until now, that's been my record. That's what was handed to me. Now what's my new way of operating?
Eric: 37:32 And it's amazing when I am older and I have kids that are 38, 37 on down and grandkids 13. And it's amazing when I sit back and I watch my older kid, you know, my kids with the learned behaviors from me and not the best learn behavior control. I mean just overthinking things. And I'm like, and I tell them, I go, yeah, that's a learned behavior. You want to get rid of it. I'm trying to get rid of this. I'll start now. And I even tell my grandkids out there in a couple of teenage, I'm like, yeah, that's a learned behavior your mother got from me. Don't go, don't be so tough on her right now. Okay. Be forgiving. That's good. That's a story. Obviously that's a learned story that came from like you're talking about, you know, from a ancestors basically. And some are good,
Chad: 38:27 right, right. Some are honorable some are moral and that's great. But we, we, the testing is, is the thing, right? Test those ideas, see how they work for you. And don't be afraid to say up until now if they're not working for you. Right. And that's kind of my point. So here's my assignment and I'm, I'm a, I'm giving our listeners in that assignment again, if that's okay. I did the last time we, we did so one of my topics, but my simon is, I'm taking a couple of sticky notes just post its writing up until now on them and just put them in a couple of common places that you find yourself thinking a lot. So like for me, um, I have one in the dashboard of my car so that every time I get my in, my car, when I drive, that's where I do my most, like thinking that's where I'm going in my head the most and I'm running these old records. Right? And so, um, I have that sticky there that says up until now so that I'm reminded as I run these old records. Yeah, up until now, that's how I've operated. Now what's my new way of operatIon? So creative couple of them in the places that you do your most thinking. The other place that I do most of my thinking is working out. I just, I run stories while I work out. I really do. And um, so, uh, a lot of times on my screensaver of my phone because I'll look at the time and stuff during my workout and watch the tabata timer as is the screensaver, but basically says up until now and a few other things. And so that's my, that's my challenge, that's my assignment to our listeners is to just really put this into practice, try it out, um, and really start to reframe some of these old records. Okay, cool. Fair enough. Eric, you're going to get your up until now. sticky?
Eric: 40:14 No, I'm going to do it. Maybe we had adapt to it up until now. T shirts are great.
Chad: 40:21 I love that. Awesome. Well, thanks for biohacking with us today.
Eric: 40:24 I appreciate it. This is this a good topic for me actually because there's a. I got a lot of conversations and sometimes I'm too busy. I needed to stay in the present and not, not talk about all my conversations in the past.
Chad: 40:38 Yeah, and here's the thing, here's the thing with any of these conversations is none of these are shame based because we're talking about all of us, you know, a lot of people are going to be listening to this conversation. They're go, oh my gosh, they're talking about me. I do this. I'm So stupid. I'm so dumb. I can't believe I do this. you're just running the same circle in shame. Shame is the, is the fuel that runs this man, right? Sure. And so don't, don't feel shame from this conversation. In fact, feel freedom and allow yourself to feel freedom and, and uh, and allow yourself to feel safe that you have some new tools to combat some of the shame with. And it's super powerful.
Eric: 41:19 I agree. It's amazing when you can let go of things. Yeah, it really is. It's I go like a new birth new life. Yeah. And I think it's a struggle for all of us. I really do.
Chad: 41:30 Yeah. And that's what's incredible, I forgot to say is when we give this language to these stories up until now, we take away all their power, right? Because right now they're very powerful. We believe this is who we are, this is the way we do things. And once you take away that power that
Eric: 41:49 comes back to that attachment, I guess you know the attachment to thoughts that, that hurt you. Why attached this something that you really can't control it, just causing you pain. And That's one thing I know we've talked about trying to let go of attachment to thought you can't do anything about. Sure.
Chad: 42:07 Yeah, yeah. It's an addiction and it's a habit and it's, it's very, very strong. So that's Why we need tools. That's why we need language and uh, will find success, success with it. So I also want to thank you for joining us on this quest for optimal fitness. If you're ready to begin your own journey into live your life in ketosis, be sure to check out biofitcoaching.com or biofit coaching on instagram. That handle is @biofit_coaching, and if this podcast has helped you at all or entertained you, we encourage you to consider going to itunes and leaving a five star rating and a review, a glowing review. This helps other listeners or potential listeners know what the conversation is about and what you get out of it, and the greatest compliment that you can give us is sharing this podcast with your friends and family, the ones who need it, the most, ones that want a different way of living, and until next time, stay keto.